GOOD TO TALK: Speaking with others can help you focus and be more positive
DO YOU talk yourself out of being excited and hopeful every time you feel good about yourself? Do you often start out feeling confident in yourself and your abilities, and then drop to zero confidence when your inner dialogue kicks in?
This negative thinking pattern is something many people struggle with, but you can combat negative thoughts with positive-self talk instead of letting an automatic negative thought process rule your life.
Many people lack the confidence to realise that they deserve to feel good about themselves. These people never pay attention to the fact that they are the ones telling themselves that they don’t deserve rewards.
Effectively dealing with this type of thinking is one of the biggest challenges for people suffering from anxiety and depression.
What we think has a powerful impact on what we feel.
If we’re in a situation where negative thinking is a big part of our day to day thoughts we can easily develop chronic anxiety or depression.
Are you one of these people? You can discover if you are sabotaging yourself by tuning into your thoughts and listening. What do you hear? Are you encouraging yourself with positive thoughts? Or are your thoughts filled with negatives?
You may not even realise how negative thinking may be dominating your life. This may be something that you deal with daily and have come to see as normal. However, it’s only normal if you allow it to be that way!
Positive self-talk is the practice of responding to negative thoughts that run through your mind. Self-talk is the act of talking to yourself either mentally or aloud.
The messages that you tell yourself will either encourage you if they are positive or fill you with self-doubt if they are negative.
For example, if you give a work presentation to a group of colleagues and by the end of it everyone looks bored or nobody gives you encouraging feedback, what do you tell yourself later?
When you’re leaving that situation, do you tell yourself, ‘I should never have done that. Maybe I’m just no good’?
Or do you say, ‘No problem. Maybe it didn’t work but at least I tried’?
The first version of self-talk will make you question your abilities and perhaps make you feel insecure about your interactions with others.
The second version allows you to give yourself a pass to try again, to just be human and interact with others.
It’s important to be aware of the key role that self-talk plays because the messages that come from it can determine your mental outlook and selfconfidence.
They can either help you succeed, or hold you back and keep you paralysed in fear.
For example, when you tell yourself that you can’t possibly land the job because you aren’t good enough, you can respond with positive thoughts that do not leave room for negativity.
Positive self-talk can be as simple or complex as you like. The important thing is that you continue to think positively.
Remember, you are the one controlling your thoughts.
Many people pair positive self-talk with affirmations. Affirmations are simple statements you can repeat to yourself over and over again. You can allow these thoughts to become true for you. The process is as subconscious as it is conscious.
When you continue to reaffirm the positive thought, you will make it true for yourself until you eventually don’t need to remind yourself to think that way. It’s often said affirmations are positive statements that can help you can change your life one thought at a time.
When you are feeling low and thinking negatively about yourself or your future, try saying, ‘I give myself permission to be successful’, or ‘I see myself in the winner’s circle’.
Strive to replace your negative statements with positive thoughts when you repeat your affirmations. Soon it will become second nature to repeat your affirmations anytime that you start to think negatively.
This is a practise that can truly change the course of your life.
You can go from being a negative person with no hope for the future, to being an optimist who can achieve anything you put your mind to.
Does this mean that there won’t be challenges along the way, or that you’ll never fail?
No, because those things are a part of life. But what it will mean is that you’ll have a better attitude and mindset.
And this mindset will allow you to grasp the very best that life has to offer.
Positive self-talk isn’t difficult and it’s worth the effort that is involved because it can truly change the way you view yourself and the world that you live in
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